So I have been on this journey of becoming great with women for about 2 years now…MANNN 2 years!!! kinda long time but kinda NOT at the same time lol. I’ve changed A LOT since then, and I want to take a moment to thank ME for all the changes I have made, all the “outer world” success as well as the “inner world” success and changes I have made SO FAR! Cool stuff…but one CHANGE that I want to first talk about here is the CHANGE in my focus of CHANGE…lol. Let me explain. 2 years ago I was just stepping onto the college party scene, I wanted a girlfriend, I wanted a girl that I can claim to be mine, so I can look cool among my friends, so I can have her by my side as I go to parties, if I had a girl by my side then I won’t have to feel uncomfortable, I won’t have to feelinsecure going to parties. I won’t have to feel like a lesser of a man when I see a dude with a girl. I would be and feel confident!
Ok the dream, the goal, the campaign…The girl, me, Happiness!!!
I set out the intention! My world begin to moved! I started attracting spiritual knowledge and all sorts of success coaches that talked about the NEW AWESOME idea, YOU CAN CREATE YOUR REALITY…using your THOUGHTS!!!!! As I look now those were some pretty exciting times, I remember sitting in my room in meditation, visualizing my dream reality, I delved in romantic, erotic thoughts. I visualized women loving me. I also looked up Pick Up material. I watched videos of Mystery, I tried the ‘kino escalation’ although a lot of the stuff was just not for me, like cold approach with a canned opener…never did that one lol, I also began to develop more and more awareness over my thoughts. I also found myself going to a lot more parties, going out and “socializing”with the help of LIQUID COURAGE LOL. I was having fun.
At night I would go out to parties, and in my free time I would look up all sorts of things dealing with personal development, personal power, law of attraction, vibration, spirituality, abraham hicks, bashar, etc. ALL this work in the pursuit of having beautiful women in my life!
I was making progress, I won’t go into all of the details but small things at a time from getting phone numbers, and then to dancing with girls on the dance floor. (I used to be deathly afraid of dancing, I may write about how I got over my fear of dancing sometime later, interesting set of circumstances came about to say the least), even making out with girls on the dance floor just 5 min after meeting them. I suddenly found myself excited to go out to different parties, I loved it and this was someone who was afraid of going out to parties just couple years before. It was a place where I could “test” different techniques and new implementations I was making to myself (mainly different affirmations to change my mindset).
I was on the grind!
I was making progress, but my sense of progress was always tied down to how well I was interacting with women. I was so “Outwardly” focused! even though I thought I was more focused on myself. I was still looking outside myself, not sometimes, but ALL the time, and I slowly began to realize this and built awareness over this phenomenon. A lot of my sense of worth or…MOST of my sense of worth was dictated by circumstances.
When the success with women wasn’t there, I would feel awful about myself, my faith in who I am striving to become would dwindle away. The “backslide” effect. Progress would slow down or for periods of time come to a screeching halt!
I began to become really sick and tired of this backslide effect, I began to become tired of having thoughts like “maybe I haven’t changed at all”, “maybe I haven’t made real progress at all”, Slowly I began to question what it is that I really wanted. Surely I wanted success with women, but deeper then that there was this urge to prove myself, to prove my power as an individual, an urge to know myself and all of the different ways I can know and experience myself. To hold and become a grander vision of myself. a grander version of who I have been.
I want to thank this new awesome way of thinking to my mentors Cory Skyy (who talked about becoming great with women is all about self improvement) and especially Destin Gerek (who talked about free writing about your ideal self, “what does he look like?” “How does he talk? walk?” “Who is this ideal, erotic self?” “Write about him, and…write about him again.”)
But the most radical, shift, the “one final push over the cliff”, came about after a very synchronistic event of reading my favorite blogger’s blog post.http://thespgdiaries.blogspot.com/2010/06/spgs-truth-changing-to-attract-women.html
“TRUTH #1: IF YOU ARE SEEKING CHANGE IN ORDER TO ATTRACT WOMEN, YOU WILL NEVER ACHIEVE ANY MEANINGFUL CHANGE.”
BAAAMMMMMMM!!!!!! imagine fire works going off inside my head. This blog post rocked me to the core, I resonated with what he was saying, understood exactly where he was coming from, and completely inspired me to finally shift my focus and make lasting changes to my whole approach to this journey that I am on.
What has transpired so far?
*Me putting a lot more focus on the subtleties of myself, being able to hold the grandestvision I have ever held about me. (Far beyond my wildest imaginations, never thought possible before!)
*I found a new healing technique. (I will share when I practice this more and see its results)
*Two new books! (Happier Than God by Neale Donald Walsch, and a free ebook fromhttp://www.yangtown.com/ called Revive Your Sex Drive.)
and the most exciting of all…
*Communication and Coaching from the SPG Life guy Himself! ATM working on self inquiry and release.
But maybe the most important of all, there is this cool, collective, patient and compassionate side of me that is growing. This side of me that tells me “It’s okay to fuck up, do not judge things as bad, only gifts, opportunities of growth.” There is this calming energy about this new side of me that keeps reassuring me that Big things are along the way. There is this renewed faith in who I am becoming, and this ideal self is someone that is wayyyyy beyond what I have ever thought possible just few months ago.
Things are getting super exciting.